Cig-A-Ro? January 14, 2005
New System of a Down track! I’m pleasantly surprised, this is better than the shit on their last album. You can check it out here, it’s called “Cigaro”.
I’ve been told a few times that you can make shitty vodka (ie. Bankers Club, Kassers, Crown Russe, etc) taste better with the use of a water filter. After seeing this, I really wish someone would have told me about this like five years ago when my friends and I couldn’t afford anything nicer than “the cheapest vodka you can find”. Oh well, I still might try it.
I know I’ve linked to BumWine.com before, but now I have a story to tell. On Thursday my last class ended at 3:15, so I was heading to the liquor store, and I saw one of my roommates walking back to the house, so I picked him up and he came along. I told him about BumWine.com on the way, and we decided to try and find some of the delightful wines they review on the site. I’ve had MD 20/20 like a million times before, those are easy to find, and not all that terrible. I wanted to try Cisco the most, I mean just read the description. Anyway, we could only find Thunderbird and Wild Irish Rose, we got one of each – Unfortunately, I was the one who bought the Thunderbird. While checking out I asked the clerk if he’d ever heard of Cisco, and he started laughing and told me it was illegal in Pennsylvania, and that he had heard it go by the name of “liquid crack” before, just like it says on the site. He was telling me how only Native Americans and homeless people bought it, and he said it was the same with Thunderbird. He said that back in the 60s and 70s, people would see each other on the streets and say something like “Whats the word? Thunderbird! Whats the price? Thirty twice!”, and that they said thirty twice because it used to cost 60 cents a bottle. We talked for a few minutes and I told him about the BumWine website. So we headed out and came back to the house. I didn’t wanna get too wasted because we planned on doing the Power Hour DVD with a bunch of people later that night, and then hitting up Maxies for Thursday night $2.50 Yuengling pitchers. I took a sip of Thunderbird and it honestly tasted like fucking gasoline, it burnt the whole way down like I was just sitting around sipping Bankers Club vodka or something. Dave’s was pretty terrible too but it did have a hint of fruit taste to it… Someone said it tasted like “bad communion wine”, which I felt was a pretty accurate description. Anyway, Dave finished his, and I finished like half of mine (I couldn’t take anymore of it). A bunch of us headed to campus to grab some dinner, and afterwards Dave started vomiting violently in the parking lot. After many jokes of how Dave and I were gonna wake up in a gutter covered in cardboard boxes, we decided to take another trip to the liquor store. Some of the others wanted to get down on some BumWine action as well, but they played it safe with some Mad Dogs. I went in with them and asked about another wine on the site that I forgot about the first time, called Night Train Express. I don’t know why I asked after tasting how terrible the two we had already gotten were, I guess I was just intrigued. He told me he had heard of it as well but that they didn’t carry it anymore, and then he reached under the counter and pulled out a copy of BumWine.com – He had printed the whole thing out and I guess he thought it was hilarious. I just thought it was strange that some of the stuff he told me was the exact same stuff on that site. Anyway, I’ll never drink either of the two we purchased again, the two of us both felt like shit the whole night, like I actually felt kind of sick and didn’t even end up going out. I do, however, plan on driving to Maryland (possibly this weekend) in search of Cisco (he told me you can buy it there), how can I resist something that has been dubbed “liquid crack”? I guess common sense would tell someone to avoid these at all costs, but what can I say, I’m a moron, and I’ll deserve whatever happens as a result of the consumption of these sweet, sweet bum wines. I realize this entire paragraph seems like one big plug for the website, that wasn’t really intentional, and I’m not making money for linking them or anything… Quit being such a grundle.
This music video by the band Soulwax is awesome.
Free Stuff: Subscription to Assets (it’s like Maxim), subscription to Comedy Scene Magazine, mini massager, bigwords.com stickers, GT Live sticker, “Gas Pig” bumper sticker, PissPeopleOff sticker, pheremone sample, air freshener, shaving stuff, everest gum, and markers.
Alright, well I’m gonna head out to the Cobra Island Rave. While I’m gone, check out Potropolis. Oh word, I also somehow managed to get on Dean’s list last semester. Yeah, I couldn’t believe it either.
JZ Jan 14, 2005
Badass man. I enjoy it. Any info on when the album is coming out? Post more songs.
Bobby Jan 14, 2005
MY COCK IS MUCH BIGGER THAN YOURS! MY COCK CAN WALK RIGHT THROUGH THE DOOR WITH THE FEELING SO PURE!
Smithers Jan 14, 2005
dammit john, u beat me to it. i was gonna post about the song too.
justin Jan 14, 2005
whats going on with the punk and rock power hour dvds? i want to buy both
KeplerNiko Jan 14, 2005
That "Man Milk" music video is disturbing. Ugh, messed up.
But good call on the Bum Wine stuff. I overhead a guy in one of my classes today talking about how he downed a bottle of Wild Irish Rose the night before–he looked to be in decent shape, but he was not feeling good. I personally want to try some Cisco one of these days, or perhaps let my friends go first . . .
influence Jan 15, 2005
bring back the camgirls..
long live boobs.
ds Jan 15, 2005
Yeah, I’m happy with the new SOAD as well. It’s definitely more impressive than anything on Steal this Album. Now I can’t help but have high hopes for the 2 albums coming out this year.
Agentspits Jan 16, 2005
you jiglet, i remember u tried the freeipods and it worked, well im sure u’ve heard of the new mini macs,well they got a free site for that aswell. help me out by signing up under me, i’d appreciate it big time.
and im sure you can get 10 people to sign up under yours by posting ur link on ur page. anyway man if it interests u help me out, if not thats coo, i love the site keep up the good work.
for more free offers check out
http://www.agentspits.com
free mini mac> http://www.FreeMiniMacs.com/?r=13894707
i just need 7 more referrals to go!!
BadxRadxAndy Jan 16, 2005
Thanks for the links to free shit. I really dig it.
Shelby Jan 17, 2005
John, I tried the vodka thing… it screwed up up britta but it smelled a lot better than shitty vodka, also a new offer is out = http://www.FreeMiniMacs.com/?r=14098556 for a free Mac Mini….
Agentspits Jan 17, 2005
shelby is trying to take my referrals
http://www.freeminimacs.com/?r=13894707
ED Jan 17, 2005
JOHN THIS IS LAST WEEKS BITCH. WHAT WAS THE RED BUMPS ON YOUR PENIS AND AROUND YOUR ASS CRACK. WHAT DID YOU GIVE ME????? CAN WE SHARE OINTMENT?????
Boob Jan 17, 2005
NICE PINK SHIRT, FAG
cosmo Jan 18, 2005
Yo John did your mouth turn black from that Thunderbird?
If so thats awesome!
I gotta find me some of this shit
cosmo Jan 18, 2005
Yo John did your mouth turn black from that Thunderbird?
If so thats awesome!
I gotta find me some of this shit
Indo Jan 18, 2005
Cosmo, you are one funny mother fucker. Your name initially attracted me because im a huge seinfield fan. The part on your site about the guy who got bit by spiders 17 times had me rolling on the floor laughing. "and he proceeded to bend over and pick up the pepper with his big spider harvesting ass" LMAO im still laughing oh jesus thats comedy, ahahah
jrod Jan 19, 2005
http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=14107586
or
http://www.FreeMiniMacs.com/?r=14107401
either would be greatly appreciated….
Joe Jan 27, 2005
John, I’m drinking Cisco as I type. There is obviously something besides alcohol in this. I’ve had less than 1/4 of the 750 mL and I’m starting to feel it. Considering it’s only 18% alcohol, I find this rather odd. When I get above 350 mL, I’ll let you know how it really is.
Shigger Feb 1, 2005
Anyone else see that video? "BalloonGoon" … ?
All I saw was the intro and was too scared to watch, haha.
Who wants to let me know what happened in it?
Denita Buffo May 19, 2011
Just browsing and located your website – thanks for the share.