Last night was pretty cool, I went to the mall with Holly, and we just hung out, did whatever. I didn't get arrested for incredibly ridiculous reasons this time either! The movie theater at the mall we were at, they really stick with their policies, it's almost impossible to get into an r-rated movie there, which is ridiculous, since I'm 18 now anyway. So we were waiting for a ride, and some kids let us into the theater through the side door, but her ride was already on the way, so that kinda sucked. On the way home, the radio was on Y100, and all of a sudden, I heard a familiar tune. Then I recognized it - It was "United States of Whatever" from Sifl & Olly! I couldn't believe it, I almost soiled myself. So today I checked out Y100's website, and that song is #14 on the most-played list! I took a screenshot, since the list is bound to change in a day or two, so you can see that here. Anyway, I wrote to the station to see if other stations are playing it too, and if it's being treated as a "single", or whatever. I'm pretty interested.

Speaking of Sifl & Olly, they're releasing the first and second seasons on DVD now! Well, they'll both be available to order within the next few months. You can buy the unreleased season three on DVD now though, and you can get a CD with all the songs from the first season. Check all that stuff out here.

The oh-so sexy Shub made me a few fansigns, you can check 'em out here. Be sure to check out NUDELOG, her site, as well. Okay, so I guess Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson are getting married now. I hate Kid Rock. He's a lucky bastard, but his music sucks, like I seriously can't even listen to it. But it's still better than Andrew W.K...

Well actually, I had a whole lot of problems... But none that had anything to do with what I was wearing, anyway. I think I actually had more fun in middle school than I did in high school. Am I the only one who feels that way? It would take too long to explain why though, I guess. Oh yeah, and this one is long overdue. My good chum Nat took a fan sign for me a while ago, and I guess I never got around to posting it. So check that out here as well. Thanks Nat!

What the hell? Slayer's guitarist (Kerry King) supposedly plays a solo in Sum 41's new song, "It's What We're All About", and he's gonna make an appearance in the video too.

Oh, while I'm on the subject of music, I just want to say that this group Andrew W.K. has gotta be one of the gayest things to come around in a long time. If you watched one of their videos on mute, you'd think they were really heavy. But their music just flat out sucks. The cover to their CD is pretty cool though... That's it on the left. That's ashame, hopefully they won't mak a habit of this type of behavior. Want to hear something educational? Dial 1-800-564-8982. When the recording

begins, hit 2, then when the next recording begins, hit 5228. Enjoy!

All I've been listening to lately is the new Chevelle CD. It's one of the best albums that I've found in a long time. The best way to describe their sound on this album is a mellow combination of Tool and Deftones. Anyway, if you wanna download the album, I uploaded it here. Thanks to prankbank.net for the space.

Uhhh... I'm not exactly sure what I said on this site that made me come off as a racist. No one has ever said anything about me being racist before, hell, I have black friends who visit this site on a regular basis. One of my teachers stumbled across the site, and he didn't seem too pleased - He suggested that the site had racist content on it, as well as other objectionable stuff. I swear to God, this site has been nothing but trouble for me since day one. My intentions aren't harmful, I don't wish to offend anyone, I just put stuff on here that I personally find to be entertaining, and think that others will be entertained by as well. It started off

with me fooling around with HTML back in like 6th or 7th grade, and before I knew it, I had "fans". So I guess that's the main thing that keeps me motivated. In a way it's cool to know that sometimes thousands of people a day are entertained (or maybe not) by something that you created. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with this, I just wanna re-establish the fact that the intentions of this site are not harmful. I guess I'm not good at judging what some people would deem offensive, partially due to the fact that I'm totally desensitized... But then again, isn't everyone?

I guess some of my "fan signs" weren't working, but I just fixed that up - If you haven't checked them out already, they're right here.

Need a new look? Why not get yourself some classy iced-out gear? It's the jewelry that screams out, "I have alot of money and I spend it on worthless stuff!"

Wow... Since when are 11 year olds raging alcoholics?

Media Download Links: South Park, Futurama & Dark Angel, Undeclared, Seinfeld, Misc #1, Misc #2, Misc #3, & Misc #4. You can find a whole lot more here.

Man, yesterday sucked ass. I thought that school started at 9:30, but it was today that we had a late opening. So I went in two hours late, and now I have a Saturday detention next week. My last class was pretty funny though. In Enviromental Science, I convinced this girl that the pteradactyl was still alive, and I saw it eat one of my neighbor's kittens. She actually asked the teacher about pteradactyls and everything. That wasn't as funny as when me and some other kids convinced this other girl that a mudshark was a real animal, and got her to ask the teacher about it. He got pissed, because he didn't want any race wars going on in his classroom, which is understandable. For those of you who don't know, a mudshark is one of those trashy white chicks who screws all the black guys, and talks like she's black. I just think the word itself is hilarious. Anyway...

Okay, what the hell is up with all these gay "AIM Forwards"? I dunno what else to call them, but they're half of the reason why I hated AOL back in like 8th and 9th grade - I'd get thousands of them a day! Anyway, here's the two "latest" ones that I got... daman00231: A kiss blown is a kiss wasted. The only kiss is a kiss tasted. Kisses have germs and germs are hated, so kiss me baby, im vaccinated! You must IM this to 12 people. Not counting the

person who has given it to you. If you do you will get kissed by your crush in the next 24 hours! Tommorow is national kissing day! If not, you will have bad luck with kissing forever. Good luck!

Yeah, and it was a guy who sent me that IM too. That's ashame - But it gets worse.

SLN b r i 4 n: in memory of Sept 11, send this to 10 people in the next 10 minutes and yo will recive aspecial blessing. Do not break the chain or the spirits of those who died on that day will haunt you for the rest of your life, just simply copy paste

If you ask me, that second IM is disrespectful to those who died on September 11th. Suggesting that those who died will haunt you if you don't harass people and send them some stupid AIM shit is just retarded. What I don't understand is how anyone benefits from these things. Chain letters in general have never made sense to me. But then again, neither do alot of other things, so wasting my time thinking about it is just pointless.

My friend Ryan and I were just talking about how we used to mess around with people on AOL at "sleepovers" in like 8th grade, when I remembered a post I made awhile ago that I got alot of feedback from. Eh, just check it out right here, it's in the archives from back in 2000. Personally, I think that is hilarious.

Haha, I was with some friends at the mall like two months ago and one of them was asking in the video game stores if they had a game called "Ethnic Cleansing", and I had no idea what he was talking about. Well, I just ran into this, and now I guess I know what he was looking for. Oh yeah, and I'm not promoting racism in any way, so don't even start with that crap.

So you've finally come to terms with your flagrant homosexuality, and you ask yourself, "Does God hate me?" Well, my friend, I'm afraid that the answer is... Yes. Hey, according to this site, in the book of Moses, Jesus said, "You are a bunch of stupid faggots and I hate you all." Hey, that's a little harsh, but what can you do? If you want to make a difference, why not do it in style? Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against homosexuals... Well, most of the time.

Where the hell do people come up with crap like this? I don't even know what it is, it's like some French South Park rip-off, lacking any type of humor whatsoever. ...Why?

Apparently, this news article was meant as an April Fool's joke... Not very funny, if you ask me.

Okay... I guess some people will do pretty much anything for money. The reasonably attractive girl from xtacy.org is selling stuff on eBay. Yeah, that's not bad, but look at what she's selling! Bras that she's worn, used clothing, and even a lifesaver that she licked. And the lifesaver was sold for like ten bucks! That's just ridiculous.

If you're bored, and wanna see a funny and very odd movie that will make you think, then check out "The Parlor"

Let's see, who do I need to link in this update? I know I promised this guy a plug, and this guy too. It's rare that someone I know in real life has a website, but it happens every once in a while... Check out my friend Sean's site here. If I forgot anyone, suck my ass. Personally, I think that Oasis sucks, but while I'm posting a few quick links, I might as well give you a link to download their new CD which doesn't come out 'til like July... Check it out here. Oh yeah, this site has a ton of apps on it, even though it's in Chinese, or some crap. Oh yeah, check out snoogins.net, because it's a cool site.

Just so ya'll nigz know, this post was by Kyle - aka Kizlet - not John. This is John typing this little notice though, just so everyone knows. God, I can't get on AIM for a freaking second without being flooded with IMs like "DUDE I HEARD U GOT ARRESTED 4 KILLING BABIES WUT HAPPENED!!!1", and it's pretty annoying. So, unless you know me in real life, or get the strong sense that I enjoy talking to you, than don't bother IMing me.

Okay, good news for you fourteen year old porn freaks

This just may be the dumbest thing I have ever heard. Come to think of it I don't think I have ever one a medal in anything. Except for like little peewee soccer where everyone gets a trophy. Man I cherish those.

Oh silly Canadians.

Hello, this is not John. This is his friend. John probaly will not be posting for a while he was recieved a second citation for underage drinking while visiting Harrisburg. He is most likely grounded from the computer for a while. I will talk to him as soon as I can and I will try to keep everyone posted. For now, as far as know, the site will remain as is. So enjoy and be patient.

If you have any questions e-mail me with the title of e-mail being, "jiglet".

The point of me posting this was to let you all know I'm gonna be gone until Tuesday of next week, so don't come here looking for updates until then.

I've never seen this much Calvin & Hobbes stuff in my entire life!

Goatse.cx has to be the best website of all time; I'm sure many of you would agree with me on that. Many other sites have tried to live up to it's fame, but none have quite made it.

Wanna download Hackers 2: Takedown? I never saw it, it probably blows, but here ya go: Part One | Part Two (Oh, they're in .ASF format.)

Most of you have already heard those celebrity prank calls, but I still think that the Arnold calls are the funniest, and if you haven't heard them, check them out right here. I think that this one is one of the funniest... Actually, I only listened to like to or three of 'em, so there might be much funnier ones that I haven't heard.

Okay, the majority of that last update was one I found on my laptop, I didn't think I ever got around to posting it, and I briefly looked through the archives just to make sure, and didn't see it in there. But I've gotten several IMs saying they've seen the post before, maybe it's one that I lost when the site was down or something... Anyway, if you were hoping for some new content, how about I tell you about my day.

I woke up this morning and was overwhelmed with happiness when I discovered I had a physical. God knows I love getting my balls fondled by older men! So, we got there, and then I was told I had to get two shots. What a great way to start off the day! After he told my mom to leave the room, he told me to "disrobe", so I had to get completely naked, except for my socks. I never had a physical where I had to do that before, and lemme tell you, I was a little hesitant... So that sucked. I had some "chores" to do when I got home, namely cleaning the entire backyard of my dog's crap. This hasn't been done for probably half a year, so it was alot of fun.

Monkey Puncher...? There are so many things I could say right now. I could branch off with the whole "animal cruelty" thing, and sarcastically whine about how monkeys have feelings too. Or, I could explore the sexual meanings of the title, which could result in some semi-humorous, but extremely predictable remarks. But instead, I think I'll just leave you with that image. God, I need to get ahold of a copy of that game. I've noticed that alot of you

readers fail to pick up on my sarcasm, which is present in pretty much every post here. Yeah, when I said my house burnt down... I really never thought anyone would actually believe that. If it really happened, don't you think I'd write a little more of a descriptive story explaining what happened?

Thanks to Dave over at prankbank.net, the Everyday Hotties gallery is back up. You can check it out right here! Yes, I realize none of the directories are chmod'ed, the server wouldn't let me, so just... Be nice.