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4.23(11:16PM):// Jesus Christ Superstar.
A 23-year-old man portraying Judas Iscariot, (the apostle who betrayed Jesus and then committed suicide in remorse), hung himself during a religious play. Fellow actors and the audience were screaming when they realized that the man wasn't acting, but was unconscious after the noose was pulled tightly around his neck. [More] Want a new e-mail address? Look no further, fepg.net has over 1,000 different e-mail addresses to choose from. Check it out.
I'd post more but... (insert excuse here) ...So come back tommorow.
4.23(2:37PM):// It's Easter. Tired of using xircon instead. I'll post more later but my family wants me to come outside to watch my uncle... He has a metal detector and he found all these old coins in our front yard or something. Uh oh, they're digging... What if they find the bodies? Shit, I gotta go! 4.23(1:35AM):// Josef Is No More. Yes, I did know for a fact that Josef wasn't real, and I also knew that Stile didn't make him up. How did I know? Well, I interviewed "Josef" and he told me then. But I would have figured it out by now anyway, would Stile really have given a person that moronic access to his site? I really doubt it, Stile is not a moron. Read more about all this here. Wear one of these t-shirts down the street and check out the reactions you get. I have been uploading alot of mp3's lately so click here to check out what I have so far. We need guns immediately! - The basic attitude of this web site, which made next to no sense to me.
Get your very own serial-killer-pen-pal to learn more amazing things just like those mentioned above! Somebody make me something from this site and then send me it, so I can shoot people with potato's or something. That would be a hell of alot of fun. Finally! Some good news. Unlike "Josef", I don't hate Mexicans. But they sure as hell have some wierd museums. Wow, the guy who created the .zip files died on April 14th at the young age of 37, of chronic alchoholism. His named was Phil Katz... Notice the P K in PKZip? Yeah, those are his initials. He was found dead in a motel room holding a bottle of liquor. Five other empty liquor bottles were also found in the room, according to the report. [More] There are only two gorillas on this planet who know sign language. Two? Oh, wait, theres only one. The other one died. This gorilla was said by his handlers that he actually knew the human language. His name was Michael, he was 27 and, according to his handlers, knew about 500 gestures in American Sign Language. He kicked the bucket Wednesday. That's the kind of luck I have. I'd teach a freaking monkey the english language, and then it would die on me like two days later, before I even got a chance to show anyone. [More] A 15-year-old high school freshman girl in an Easter Bunny suit removed the head part of her costume, and set it down. Her assistant pushed her and she fell over her head. The Easter Bunny then got up and punched her assistant a couple of times. The girl's 20-year-old assistant also was arrested after the fracas Monday. "Mom, why is the Easter Bunny fighting? Make it stop!" [More] Okay, so you go to a swamp in Florida to photograph alligators. You need to take a nap, but don't want to get eaten. What do you do? Well, you don't do this. Shit, I am so tired... Read the rest of the articles on you're own, I'm too tired to summarize them. Here. Here. Here. Here. Here. Here. Here. But read them, they're funny. I have one last thing to say about this whole Napster deal. Screw Metallica. I love their music, but what they are doing right now is just ridiculous. I mean... Well, just look at this shit. Use Napster while you can, I have a feeling it won't be around for much longer.
Oh yeah, and um... Happy Easter.
I just watched Disturbing Behavior, and I would say it's a pretty cool movie, despite what other people told me. Oh yeah, go see Romeo Must Die, that was a cool movie too.
How to have fun in McDonalds: Throw a creamer at one of your friends, then act like you have no idea where it came from. Then 'accidentally' trip on it, causing the cream to squirt out all over the floor. A fat slob in uniform will find his way over and clumsily mop it all up, and then put up one of those yellow "Caution: Wet Floor" signs. A few minutes later, he will waddle over and look at the floor, conclude that it is dry enough to be safe for walking, and take the sign away. Then walk into that area and pretend to slip, and make a loud, painful outburst.
It's pretty funny, we did something along those lines this morning. If people actually get a kick out of reading this kind of stuff, I'd consider making a section devoted to all of the shit like this that me and my friends do... Although I couldn't post half of it because it would just be asking to get into trouble.
Okay, well I have to go to my little sister's Confirmation thingy now, my family left without me so I have to walk to church. This is all your fault, you piece of shit.
I just got home from taking my friend Ryan to the train station, and there was a big line of people at the Harrisburg Train boarding stairs. Well there was this one chick there, and she had a 'Cedar Cliff Basketball' shirt on. I thought that was really cool, because Cedar Cliff is the school that I went to last year... Damn I miss it, I used to have so much fun there. Well, no one gives a shit so I'm not going to bitch about that.
Wait a minute... What the hell is this? iMac babes? I still don't understand who takes time out of their lives to draw this crap. Although it is pretty cool-looking... In a completely non-arousing way, mind you.
Yeah, like I'm gonna tell you that and then leave you hanging... Click here to download it. Some advice: If someone takes the time to say this to you, chances are they probably aren't too fond of you. SASS - Speak-and-Spell Simulator. I remember back in middle school in computer class, we had a program that would say whatever you typed in (even though it sounded like shit) and we would always type in "naughty words" and then crack up hearing them said in the "old mans" voice. Looking back on that, it's pretty stupid, but oh well. I want this car, right now! Making something like that must be a lot of tough work, it must have taken some real commitment to put that together. Okay, I figured out exactly what I want to do for a living. I want to become an interactive bra. Just look through the site, judging from the images of the guy who is working, it doesn't look like a bad occupation at all. Any takers? Yeah, any chicks out there want one of these? Just let me know, I'd be more than glad to help you out.
McSpotlight.org... I guess the people who made this site aren't too fond of McDonalds.
Was Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon purposely aligned with The Wizard of Oz?
I'm downloading the entire movie right now off of an FTP server. It's about 200-something MB and it's only at 41% but it has been downloading since yesterday afternoon. It's an mpeg file, and when you play it, it has the "Dark Side Of The Moon" album playing in the background, synchronized with "The Wizard Of Oz". I think that is pretty damn cool. How is it possible that so many of you have never heard of that? Well, read more about it by going here, it is a resourceful site for more information on it. If you want the IP for the FTP site that the mpeg file is on (whew!) just IM me or something. Also, check out The Dark Side Of The Rainbow for more information and stuff. I heard that if you play the new Celine Dion CD while you watch Cum Guzzling Seductress Queens III, there is a similiar effect.
I swear to god, this site has my cracking up every time I go there. With sections such as "Why Should the Devil Have All the Good Music?" and "Christian Rock: Blessing Or Blasphemy?", which accuse Amy Grant of being a witch and a satanist! And then there's my favorite... "The Truth About Hell". Hmmm... Listen to this. Actual sounds from the pits of hell? You decide. I wouldn't be surprised if some of my readers were scared by this. Scared? Go here, it will make you happy.
Want a "sneak-peek" of Eminem's new album? Well, click here to download one of the songs that is supposedly gonna be on the album. The sound quality blows, but it sounds like a decent song, it's called "Our House".
More updates later, for now I gotta get some stuff done.
Hung Thanh Mai... Sounds like a real badass, doesn't he? Well, he killed a cop... He is on trial for slaying CHP Officer Don Burt, and on Tuesday he flipped out and "toppled the defense table in a profanity-filled tirade Monday before being wrestled to the floor by seven deputies." I think that would be funny as hell, to see an Asian dude flipping out liek that and cursing and being wrestled to the ground, its sorta hard to picture... Okay, I just pictured it. That's pretty damn funny! [More]
California officials want to take recycling to the next level... By turning toilet water into drinking water. They insist that their "toilet-to-tap" idea is a safe solution to California's water shortages. A few residents think the idea is revolting... A FEW!? I wouldn't drink any of that shit!
"Oh, those are... those are just minerals Billy, drink it up, it's good for you."
The three-year "pilot program" could possibly begin as early as Monday in the San Fernando Valley, although the reclaimed water won't actually reach faucets for five years. If successful, the program would mark the first time in California that toilet water would be used for drinking. It then would be combined with quality urine and feces to complete the naturalization process. Well, Idaho is known for it's potato's, Colorado is known for it's trenchcoats, and Florida is known for it's Oranges. Is California going to be India is hoping to cash in on the popularity that has been surrounding "Who Wants to be A Millionaire?" By creating their own version of the hit U.S. quiz show... With an indian twist. The name of the new version is "Who wants to move to a different country?" No, I'm joking, the Hindi version of the show will be titled "Who Wants To Be A Ten-Millionaire", and will be hosted by Hindi movie superstar Amitabh Bachchan. It will hit the airwaves in June. Unlike its U.S. namesake, the top prize will be 10 million rupees, a huge sum in a country where the annual per capita income is $370. 10 million rupees is equal to 132 American dollars. [More] Um, what the hell is this? The kid in the picture is a fag, and I just think this is gay. So don't check it out. Seriously. Holy crap, check out these Playstation 2 screen-shots. Those graphics are amazing, I have a feeling that when it is released in the US it is gonna blow Dreamcast out of the water. Playstation 2 is currently Sony's most profitable product. It includes a DVD player and will eventually offer Internet access. The company said it had shipped 1.4 million in the month after the game's March 4 launch in Japan. The console and its memory card have been designated as "general-purpose products related to conventional weapons" because they contain components that could be used for military devices, such as missile guidance systems. Military analysts cited the example of a Tomahawk missile that needs to be able to "see" where it is going until it strikes its target, and must process graphic material at high speed to keep to its target. PlayStation 2's graphic processing capability is fast enough to enable it to be used in a missile. "We have mixed feelings because our efforts to produce a game console of the highest quality have resulted in legal restrictions," the Asahi Shimbun newspaper quoted an official of Sony Computer Entertainment as saying. "We could not compromise because of the fierce competition in the industry." Sony Computer Entertainment said that users could illegally manipulate the machine to copy DVD movies to videotape, which is also pretty damn cool... I'm buying one as soon as it hits the shelves, thats pretty much all I can say. Speaking of buying stuff, somebody buy me this! Please...? Oh yeah, I want one of these too. Uh oh... The FBI screwed up. They lost a computer which contained information classified in the most sensitive category. U.S. officials say there is concern some of the information on the computer was so-called "code word" material, a classification higher than top secret. [More] Wow, Big Tetris! "La Bastille" is a personal computer running Linux, containing eleven custom-built circuit boards, a twelve-story data network, and over 10,000 Christmas lights. It transforms Brown's fourteen-story Sciences Library into a giant video display which allows bystanders to play a game of Tetris which can be seen for several miles. Even though teris sorta sucks... That would be the shit! Here is a picture of it... Now that I look at it, it doesn't really look that cool. For more images, go here. ThePopesFuneral.com is for sale. Come on people, show a little respect, its sad to see that anyone will sink that low just to make a quick buck... Wait, what am I talking about? They could probably make some nice money off of selling that domain... [More] Speaking of making a cheap buck... An Italian housewife has gone into the prayer business to rescue the souls of people whose daily life leaves no time for them to attend to their own salvation. For $1.50, Monica Ballinari will say a prayer for a lost relative or perform the sign of the cross once a day. Um yeah, I'll pray for you guys, I promise, send me some money and every day I will pray for like 6 hours, seriously... You can trust me! [More] Okay, I have more interesting news articles but I have already posted too many tonight so this is the last one... Area 51 photos! If you've already seen it... Then don't go again. Oh yeah, and some stole a 150-pound Buddha statue from the entryway of a Chinese Restaurant (More), a 17-year-old girl snorkeling for the first time was almost killed when a needle-nosed houndfish jumped out of the water and struck her in the neck, leaving two pieces of the fish's serrated bill, including one that came within a millimeter of her carotid artery (More), pissed-off Canadians (More).
Okay, well I am going to go stare at the cow cam for a few hours now.
What a moron. Some people just... Well, I'm not gonna get started. I gotta get some sleep now. And damn, what's going on with Stile? Is this the end? Plus, more MP3's comin your way tommorow. For now, check out the new pictures section, and sign my damn guestbook!
Heres a strange story. Three guys were out drinking on April Fool's Day, and as it got later into the night and then earlier into the morning, one of them got the idea of smashing a few mailboxes in rural Prince William County, one of their old pasttimes which they hadn't done for a while. The eldest of the group was the unlikeliest member of the trio: the high school English teacher of the other two boys. Robert A. Gaige, 23, was drinking that night and led his two students on a vandalism joy ride, smashing nine mailboxes and ultimately throwing a bottle of wine at the window of a convenience store. He was arrested yesterday and charged with two counts of contributing to the delinquency of minors and 10 counts of destruction of private property. Those are all misdemeanors... Come on, he was just having some good old-fashioned fun. Which one of you has never played mailbox baseball? [More]
Remember the movie "The Goonies"? Well, if so, then I'm sure you remember Chunk, the most notable character in the movie. Who would have ever thought that he would have some hot chicks stalking his ass?
A reaction like that over getting in contact with Chunk? A little over-enthusiastic, if you ask me, although it sounds like he's a cool guy. Read more about the "Chunk-Hunters" over here. IamDrunk.com: Your one-stop source for drunk photos, stories, links, etc. Good stuff. After reading Robot Frank's journal over again, I have come to an important conclusion. I am going to build a robot army and take over the world. Yeah, thats right. I'm learning how to right now over at ARS Robotica, and I already made... Well, I'm going to make alot of cool stuff, you just wait and see. Yeah, thats right, laugh now, but today its LEGO's, tommorow, umm... better stuff then LEGO's!
Okay, to be honest with you, that last paragraph was probably the dumbest thing I have ever typed on this website. But hey, I mean I found some cool robot links and I wanted to post them, and I like to be unique in the way that I post links and stuff. Okay, later this afternoon I will be swtiching servers, from altern.org to sock-o.com. Thanks again to Twinkie for generously offering to host me, I have gotten several other offers, but none of them ever really followed through. Oh yeah, keep checking out the mp3 section, I add mp3's whenever I get a chance.
CyberSlut69: Mmmm... All alone.
Us: Hahaha, lets go find some more!! Yeah, we used to get a kick out of that shit. I sort of lost my train of thought since I took the time to write that, but basically the point I was trying to get across was... "Hacking for girlies" is about as cool as Richard Simmons giving out free handjobs in front of WalMart.
I have alot more shit for you today, some funny stuff man, but I have alot to do right now, so I'll do my best to try and post it in a few hours. For now, if you haven't already, check out Robot Frank. It's alot funnier then this piece-of-crap page will ever be!
I am having "girl-problems", so I have been pretty bummed out about that... That's why I haven't been updating too often lately. Plus, I'm on spring break, and I have been doing more stuff off the the computer then usual. Okay, well my show is on now so I gotta go, might update again later tonight.
Dr. Who + Mahir = This page.
"Well, this happened long ago, but it was quite bad. It took me months to come out and tell someone. My boyfriend got me pregnant and since we were so poor we were forced to live on welfare. I didn't know how I could afford to live, my boyfriend had a drug addiction and he kept spending all of our money. He was well into debt with this low life seal that lived a block away. About 9 month later I had the kid, it was a cute girl called Tiffany. Little did I know, my boyfriend had arranged a deal to pay off his drug habit with our kid. When we got home he took my precious kid away and gave her to the seal. I had lie to my parents and said I had a miscariage. I hope my story will help others that have the same experience."
"this is hard for me to tell, the story was so horrific, but i'll try to compose myself. ok, i was vacationing with my uncle in the arctic circle. he has a house up there. well, one one of the calmer days (when it wasn't too much below zero, i deecided to go check out the land around my uncles cabin. so i bundled up, and headed out. on my way out of the door i heard my uncle say, " watch out for the seals!" now, i thought to myself, why should i look out for seals? uncle was just in one of his moods i thought. so i headed out. i walked for about a mile, when i noticed i wasn't alone. a few hundred yards behind me was a group of seals. they were following me, and they were gaining. there must have been thirty of them. i figured it was best to go back to uncles, after all, he did warn me, and given the present situation, i wasn't taking the warning lightly anymore. i got back to the cabin, and saw that the seals were less than a football field away. they were charging!!! i told uncle what was going on and he ran up to his room. he returned a moment later with two wooden louisville sluggers. " this is the only way they can be stopped." he said solemly. we went outside and there were the seals. we immediatly started swinging. left and right we swung. connecting with heads, flippers, backs, whatever we could hit. i didn't see one of them sneek up behind me though, and it got my ankle, so i stomped it with my boots. as the battle raged across the barren snow plains, the sun started to set. the seals eventually retreated, well, what was left of them that is. uncle and I ate like kings for a month with all of the kills we had. plus, we made good money selling the pelts."
Seals are a plague to our fragile earth. Personally, I was molested by a seal when I was 6, and it will haunt me for the rest of my life. We must unite against these terrible creatures before they take over! That's why you should help yourself and everyone that you care about by clubbing a seal for world peace.
Did you ever wonder where farts come from? No, niether did I. But apparently someone did, or nobody would have spent time creating "The Skinny On Farts". Who has time to make that kinda crap?
Wow... Sega is giving away free Dreamcasts! Want one? All you have to do is... Sign up for their new "SegaNet" ISP.
Four athletes have been charged in the case of a 17-year-old girl who authorities believe was videotaped having sex with at least two of them. The tape, which was shown around campus, was destroyed by one of the athletes when he learned of the investigation. The girl, who had been drinking alcohol that night, doesn't remember having sex with the men, but she says a friend told her about the videotape. Michael Farrell, a wide receiver on the football team, was charged Wednesday with taping the sex and showing it to others, and tampering with evidence for allegedly destroying the tape. He could face up to 21 years in prison if convicted of the felonies. He was released on $2,000 bail. [More]
What in the hell is this? If you get off looking at pics like that, just lemme know, I'll gladly come over to your house and remove your genitals for you. Anime is cool and all, but I will never understand this anime-porno shit. WHAT THE HELL!? That is not sexually stimulating, it looks like a damn alien or something.
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