Jeez, someone has a thing for slurpees... May I reccomend one of these?

It is time to take a stand... Stop clown porn immediately! Click here to help support the cause.

What the hell is this? Some kind of bible?

I have nothing much else to do right now, so I figured, "what the hell, I might as well post some messed-up news..."

There are alot of rats in New York City. How many? An estimated 70 million. And the number is growing every day. [More]

A Russian trucker has been allowed to cross the border into the Ukraine after telling customs officials the 28,000 condoms he was carrying were all for his own use. [More]

The U.S. Federal Bureau of Investigation is using a superfast system called Carnivore to covertly search e-mails for messages from criminal suspects. I don't like the sound of that at all. We lose more and more freedom every day. [More]

Inmate Brian McCluskey may have found heaven at the Purgatory Correctional Facility in Utah. A bag of M&Ms he earned for helping with chores at the jail could be the million-dollar winner of a national contest - or it might be just another bag of candy. [More]

A ritzy Beverly Hills jewlery store thinks the Gloved One favors the five-fingered discount over the old fashioned point-of-sale transaction. And it's looking for payback. The owners of David Orgell, a posh Rodeo Drive jeweler known for providing pricey baubles to the stars, sued Michael Jackson yesterday, claiming the King of Pop left the store with a $1.9 million watch. You think that's funny? Just look at this picture of the child-molesting little fag. Had me cracking up for... Well, it actually didn't even make me laugh, but still, it's pretty funny. [More]

A new ad campaign for the movie "Jaws" that features posters of giant, bloodthirsty sharks plastered along Los Angeles beaches has drawn the ire of some locals, who say the image is disturbing to young swimmers. I forgot to post this... But about an hour after me and my friends got out of the water when we were staying at Outer Banks, NC, two girls were bitten by sharks, and a lifegaurd made everyon eget out. The one girl got bit really bad too. Pretty scary, but then again... It didn't happen to me, so who cares? Ignorant? Nah... [More]

Banned Canadian sprinter Ben Johnson raced again on Wednesday. But the prize was not a medal... It was his wallet. Police said Johnson, 38, had been robbed by a group of gypsy children who distracted his attention as he was walking down Rome's elegant Via Veneto at around 10:45 a.m. A group of gipsy children? Haha, they never seemed to be a problem around here... [More]

A man was found hanged from a tree near a park Monday, gagged, handcuffed and wearing women's clothes. Police said the death was accidental and sexual in nature. Witnesses say that they saw this man fleeing the scene of the crime. [More]

"I love farts. Not coming out of guys, coming out of girls. It was always the overall idea of a girl farting that sent me ballistic. Over the course of my young life I smelled many-an-ass, naked and clothed, some smelled dreamy, some smelled horrid, but each and every time in my entire life that I've smelled a fart coming from a girl I immediately got horny; gross smelling or not. But now I was getting older, and things were starting to change. Physically. By the time I was about 13 or 14 I had such a fart fetish. Man, I masturbated with my special "grind" technique 4 times a day if not more, thinking about fart incidents. Just for example, I was at the park with a girl from school, and we were on the swings when suddenly she farted really loud! She denied it of course, and I played along, but pretty soon I was smelling that one. The smell was so strong that it hit me in the nose ten-fold. My penis regained consciousness, and I went home happy." This is all directly quoted from this page... And I really don't know what to say, since I can't tell if it is a joke or not... Man, that is some wierd shit.

Don't worry, I can top that. I have something even more messed-up coming up in my next update, which will be later tonight. I have to work from 7 until close, so no more updates until around midnight.

7.12(3:48PM):// Aorta Showed Me...
According to Aorta, pop-tarts are evil. Eating them will leave you looking something like this. Any questions? I dunno about this Aorta character, he always seemed a little bit strange. Hasn't he been in a mental institution before?



7.12(12:11AM):// News & Shit.
God... I know you are all sick of hearing about my ex-girlfriend and my personal life, but I just found out that she dumped me only because this other guy has a car! That is so insanely shallow, makes you lose all respect for a person. I called her up basically in tears and she completely blew me off, she wouldn't answer any of my questions. Also, she blocked me on AOL right after she dumped me, just so she could have an easy, smooth, guilt-free breakup. Isn't that nice? God, what would drive someone to put a guy through so much shit? Everyone said I was like the sweetest boyfriend, obviously I didn't take any of it to heart, but it makes me wonder what I could have possibly done wrong. Even when you are really pissed off at a girl... It's still fun to look at other girls. I now present to you... Other girls!
[ [ [ [  [1]  [2]  [3]  [4]  [5]  [6]  [7]  [8]  ] ] ] ]

If you are a male... And you own a penis... Then you might get a kick out of The Penis Owner's Manual. If you like music, and want to support growing artists, then check out DJ Wax, who asked for me to plug him. Hey, I'm just cool like that I guess.

I am sorta confused... What the hell is all this talk about "Big Brother"? Is it another one of those "Survivor" type shows? Or is it more along the lines of "The Real World? From what I have heard, the ratings on this "Big Brother" show are dropping... Read about it here.

Wow, if I got a pair of the boxers mentioned here, apparently I could have girls begging me to take them off! Haha, nice sales pitch.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the single most entertaining website in the entire world... Yeah right. Click here.

Forget seven-league boots. A Russian scientist has invented gasoline-powered footwear, whose wearers can take a great leap forward — 13 feet at a time. [More]

A Brazilian city has decided it is time to gag those who gab on mobile phones in public places where concentration is prized. Residents of the thriving city of Campinas will be yanked out of their movie seats, escorted out of libraries or barred from classrooms if their cellular telephones ring. [More]

July 10-16 is the 25th annual National Nude Recreation Week, when confirmed nudists hope to entice naked newbies to the joys of the clothing-optional life. First launched in 1975 by Wisconsin's Naturist Society, supporters of Nude Recreation Week are encouraging first-timers to head to nude beaches or the more than 230 clubs hosting clothing-optional celebrations. [More]

A woman got into a pensioner's house in the US, stripped and demanded sex before robbing him. Nathaniel Bradley, from Tabor City, North Carolina, said he let her into his home because she wanted to use his phone. [More]

Tomato ketchup is undergoing a radical transformation in the US - from red to green. The manufacturers, Heinz, claim the new colour will make the sauce more appealing to children. [More]

Reigning queen of pop music Britney Spears isn’t getting hitched so fast — or rather, not fast enough for the British tabloids. The News of the World, Britain’s biggest-selling tabloid, quoted a friend close to the couple as saying Justin Timberlake, 19, proposed to the chart-topping Spears two weeks ago in New York. However, this turns out to have been untrue. [More]

A Bulgarian man was in police custody in Canada on Friday after being arrested for trying to smuggle in more than 5,600 tablets of the drug ecstasy hidden in pantyhose he was wearing under his clothes. [More]

Louisiana's Supreme Court has upheld the state's 195-year-old sodomy law, under which consenting adults could receive up to five years in prison for engaging in oral or anal sex. [More]

Hungry Brazilians packed the dockside of a northern city on Thursday to snap up 20,000 chickens given away by farmers angry at a government ban on imports of genetically modified food. [More]

Working through an overpowering stench, rescue workers pulled dozens more bodies Tuesday from a wall of garbage that collapsed in a city dump, crushing a collection of shacks known as the Promised Land and killing at least 85 people. [More]

The cow's come home... and all that's left of it is the head and udders. Two Northwestern students face felony charges after University Police found the mutilated Moo@NU cow - stolen in May from Norris University Center - in a room at Phi Gamma Delta, police said. Weinberg junior Boris Labinov, 20, of 2331 Sheridan Road, and Weinberg junior Nicholas Hughes, 21, of 2331 Sheridan Road, were arrested and charged with theft in connection with the incident, said Lt. Glenn Turner of University Police. [More]

7.11(4:17PM):// I Graduated From The School Of Ass.
I forgot to mention this, but a few weeks back, I was contacted by "editor dink" from The School Of Ass, concerning a webmaster interview. He was conducting questionnaires, questioning things that many people probably wanted to know. But he wasn't sending these questionnaires to just anyone... Only the top 24 'e/n' webmasters on the 'net. Here is where my ego kicks in... Wait, I don't have an ego, nevermind. Anyway, I didn't have much time, so I agreed and filled out the form. Looking back, I think I could have answered the questions a little better, but I'm glad I did it, it's just cool to see my site ranked up somewhere near sites such as The Stile Project and Cloud10.org. Anyway, now I'll get to the point. You can click here to check out the interview, but I'd also recommend that you check out The School Of Ass, which is one of my favorite websites. By the way, the site might offend you, it is slightly pornographic, so that being said.... Don't go there!

Oh yeah, something else I forgot all about. We got this one handout in Global Studies near the end of the school year, when we were studying Middle-Eastern culture, Muslims and the like. I scanned the handout because I found it to be quite humorous, but you be the judge. I would say something like "if you are a girl, don't be offended by this for this reason...", or some kind of crap like that, but right now I am not very pleased with the opposite sex. Well, that's not very fair to say, one girl breaks your heart so you hate all of them? Nah. I'm just going through a really hard time right now... I don't hate girls, I just need to focus my anger a little better, instead of hating an entire sex, maybe an individual, or an action performed by an individual. I don't really hate anyone... Well, a few people... What the hell am I talking about? Oh yeah, well anyway, here's that image I scanned.

7.11(3:00PM):// This Blows!
Dammit, all of my new updates got deleted somehow. How? I don't know. I just know that computers suck and aren't reliable in the least. I was just finished with a huge update, biggest one I have probably ever done, and then it all got erased, and so did the past few updates. Anyway, I'm too tired to do anymore for right now, but check out these two news stories to see what has been up with Eminem lately.



7.9(12:14PM):// Girls Suck.
As those of you who know me on a personal level may or may not already know, I was pretty involved with a girl named Jen, and the 5th of this month was our seven-month anniversary. Well, I checked my e-mail on the 3rd while I was out in NC, and I had an e-mail in my inbox from her telling me about this guy she met, and how "wonderful" he is. Okay, that makes alot of sense, right? Getting e-mails from your girlfriend about some other guy and how great he is. So I wrote her back asking her what was up with that, and when she wrote back... She acted like she didn't even know that we were going out. What kind of fucking bullshit is that? She also decided to be a bitch and include infornmation on how she really likes the guy. What kind of bullshit that? So I got upset, really upset, and I called her, and told her that I wanted to know where we stood, a yes-or-no answer on whether or not we were together. Well, who can guess what she said? Now, she won't even talk to me, for some fucking reason, she has me on block online! She is making me feel like a stalker he, but I think i have a right to know what the fuck is up... I mean, we were together for 7 months, most of which I spent the majority with her. How can girls do that kind of shit? I mean where does she get the nerve to block me? So you people know just as much as I do about this. I am heartbroken, confused, and pissed-off. To all the girls reading this [any?], gimme a shout and tell me what would prompt someone to do this, where I possibly messed up... I don't feel that I caused any of this, but I don't have a clue as to what might have...

I will update later on today, Ryan took the train out to the town where I live to pick up his girlfriend and bring her back here, and then me and her will be going back together, in like 3 days. But I'm sure I will get back on schedule with my updates within a day or two, so keep coming back, and keep on sending in those pictures of your dads masturbating... Wait, actually, don't. I don't like those. Seriously, please don't. I don't recall asking anyone to send me anything like that at all. Blech.

7.8(9:13PM):// Skwah In De Boos.
Okay, I'm back from Outer Banks in North Carolina, and I did have a blast, although some things did succeed in interfering with my fun, all of which I will tell you, the reader, about later. I am in Harrisburg now, at my friend Ryan's house, and I am kinda feeling tired and sorta sick, so I will do a major update later on this evening, that is if Ryan find's the time to take a break from his uncurable addiction to Diablo II.



6.30(8:23AM):// Christina Aguilera...
Everyones favorite inspiration for reproduction, Christina Aguilera, has written a 'dis-rap about Eminem. I haven't even listened to it yet, but you can download it in MP3 format by clicking here. I don't think it was actually done by her though, although like I said, I haven't heard it yet, it was in my sister's MP3 folder, so for all that I know, this could be like just one-half of the actual song. But I have to leave for the 30th Street Station in Philly now, so have a nice week.